Thursday, 8 November 2007

Businessman Resigns From Government Shock

Reading between the lines: Paul Drayson’s resignation letter


Dear Gordon, as you know I have a passion for motor racing and over the past year have competed in the British GT championship racing a unique bio- ethanol-fuelled car, achieving a "historic first" win for a green-fuelled car …


yada yada: I’m sure you’ll be enthralled to know what a superb driver I am. Nothing quite as green as motor racing, eh?


Unfortunately, it cannot be combined with the challenge of full-time government office


Bit of a quandary: public service, or boy-racer ? Boy-racer, or public service ?...


so, as we discussed, I am writing to inform you that I wish to take a leave of absence from the government to enable me to do this.


I think you’ll find it’s covered under your new ‘flexible working’ policies. And as I’m such an important person, we agreed there should be a public exchange of letters to commemorate this significant event.


Thank you for your support in understanding why I am so keen to pursue my racing ambition.


Actually, they tell me you won’t understand at all, because you are a joyless political obsessive. This played no part in my decision to leave your government, however, because …


I have greatly enjoyed being a minister.


Well, I greatly enjoyed my ‘dealings’ with Tony, anyway. And, as he said to me only last week, “Government ? can’t think why I ever bothered – all the money’s out here playing with the big boys, innit !”


I am proud of what this government has achieved. We have delivered an unprecedented amount of new equipment to the front line to support our forces in Iraq and Afghanistan


Well, not perhaps delivered to the front line, exactly, (although I thought the coroner was a bit unfair in the case of Fusilier Gentle) but we’ve certainly spent a lot of money on it all. A shame about the shortages of body-armour, but there we are.


I would be delighted to have the opportunity to serve again in your government.


Just arrange for large amounts of stuff to be procured from one of my companies again, and I’ll be up for another stint.


Yours ever, Paul Drayson

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Come the revolution

RobW said...

This is very good. I wish all political figures were forced to annotate their correspondences like that.

Mark Wadsworth said...

Who says motor racing is not 'green'?

If tens of millions of people shut of everything (except their TV) for a few hours every second Sunday to watch the Formula One, then think how much energy those people are NOT using. Probably pales into insignificance compared to the energy that the Formula One circus does use.

Nick Drew said...

rob - thanks. Gordon Brown too has been known to annotate his speeches: see

http://hatfieldgirl.blogspot.com/2007/11/poets-response-to-taking-liberties.html

Mark - my guess is that your last sentence is correct ! (& they draw crowds of 100,000+, travelling huge distances)

anon - I am sure we all have our Little Lists ...

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