Wednesday 4 February 2009

John Prescott's top fifty. {5} l

Continuing on. The last of John's fifty things Labour have achieved since 1997.

{ in the comments of I have been set straight on a number of issues, like waiting lists where I foolishly looked at NHS figures, but had no idea that there is a wait to be put on the list. D'Oh..imagine falling for that old fiddle BQ. There were more too, so maybe a post later on which will also include the Tories response to Labour's "What did the Millennium's do for us?"

41. New Deal - helped over a million people into work {At a cost of 3 billion pounds to 2007."Almost half of the young people who take part in the Government's flagship welfare-to-work programme return to claiming benefits within 12 months" Should have just given them the £300 each. Plus the figure is nearer 200,000 I believe. 800,000 people have been through the New Deal at least twice? Hardly a success. No credit}

42. Over 1.5 million child trust funds have been started { And a shocking waste they are. The idea that people would top them up has never materialised. Basically GB has given future 18 olds a deposit for a scooter. Why? }

43. Free eye test for over 60s {Free for all in Scotland. And free parking when you go to get them. + children, people on low income and people suffering from or predisposed to eye disease could always get them. anyway, partial credit, you should have just made them free for all.}

44. Five, six and seven year olds in class sizes of 30 or less {Really. My two are in classes of 31 and 33. Am I the exception? On the back of a fall in the number of children it was a pretty easy target. Shame that immigration damaged your numbers or you could have got a point.}

45. Free entry to national museums and galleries {Yep. should have shut the VAT dodge earlier than 2005, but it was a good cultural policy. Full credit}

46. Overseas aid budget more than doubled {So glad we can afford it! Money to India to help their cash starved space program. Money for China, to give them a lift because they aren't really a powerhouse. OK so its all about 'HELP' for our exports but really... zero credit except for excessive waste.}

47. Cancer death rates down by 12 per cent, saving 43,000 lives {lucky lucky.Health promotion OK. Shame they haven't fallen equally on rich and poor though. Does that tell us something? And no it isn't BUPA.}

48. Cut long-term youth unemployment by 75 per cent {doubtful, very very doubtful. I see it on all the top 50 achievement lists, the Chancellor always bangs on about it, but haven't seen any evidence. Let's hold this one until you can provide the link, not the soundbite}

49. Free nursery places for three and four-year-olds in England, Scotland and Wales

{Great. A really good idea. Only slightly marred by the fact that its for 2.5 - 3 hours a day only. Just enough time to get the shopping,not really enough time to get a job. Still full credit}

50. Free fruit for all four to six-year-olds at school. {really? that's the clincher. An apple? well, if you say so.}

So there you have it. An unparalleled run of success and over achievement, all under budget and on time....or do you disagree ?

{for those who have taken issue with the few points that received a credit, think; Judge Advocate's wig and robes, horns and a forky tail plus a trident, smell of brimstone, cloven hoof footprints, fire,and eternal damnation.}


James Higham said...

Only caught the end of this. Well annotated. Chuckled.

Prodicus said...

Photo: it must have choked Brown to have to endure being behind both Blair and Prescott in the order of precedence.

Anonymous said...

So who writes JP's Blog? Given the structure and language in my view it is highly unlikely to be the man himself. Is it his son David, as suggested elsewhere? Or one of those poor interns or researchers chained to their to their computers in the bowels of the Houses of Parliament trawling the internet for scraps to feed the bloggers and twitters?

Anonymous said...

Over 1.5 million child trust funds have been started { And a shocking waste they are. The idea that people would top them up has never materialised. Basically GB has given future 18 olds a deposit for a scooter. Why?

Nope, that one was sponsored by the brewers.

Bill Quango MP said...

Caption Competition

Blair. " Two more years of these clowns and its JP Morgan directorships, buy to lets, EU post to something or other and book signings all day long"

Prescott. "Cucumber sandwiches again!
Bah. Barely fills the mouth, never mind the gut"

Brown. "So if Duncan's dead and Banqo's dead then I'm King."

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