The time of year for 'what do we do in the summer?' approaches the City. As ever, budgets get reviewed, strategy gets decided and some places do appraisals too - anything to while away the hours until September.
'360' appraisals are now in vogue as they waste even more peoples' time and can provide excuses to sack managers who are normally hard and expensive to get rid of. I wonder if Gordon Brown ever had 360 appraisals when he was Prime Minister from the No 10 staff?
So to kick off - some classic appraisal feedback below, ever had any of it?
"Since my last report, this employee has reached rock bottom and has started to dig."
"His men would follow him anywhere, but only out of morbid curiosity."
"I would not allow this employee to breed."
"This associate is really not so much of a has-been, but more of a definitely won't be."
"Works well when under constant supervision and cornered like a rat in a trap."
"When she opens her mouth, it seems that this is only to change whichever foot was previously in there."
"He would be out of his depth in a parking lot puddle."
"This young lady has delusions of adequacy."
"He sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them."
"This employee should go far - and the sooner he starts, the better."
"This employee is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot."