Thursday 12 January 2012

Question Time - new series.

New series of the world famous Question Time game.
All the fun of Punch and Judy politics with a dose of class war and public/private pension apartheid.

The rules are simple.

Consider the recent news stories, the QT panel, the week's location for the show. Deduce the likely thinking of a BBC producer/editor in attempting to craft an entertaining, yet serious, politics/current affairs panel show.
Then you list up to five questions that you believe that members of the audience will ask the panel.

Tonight: David Dimbleby is joined in London by
Justine Greening,{One of Osborne's 'Untouchables.' - So called because she's one of the trusted trigger men and women at the Treasury Department. Or possibly, she just doesn't like being touched.}
Douglas Alexander,Shadow Foreign and Comm office. Long time cabinet member, planner,plotter and part of the Scots labour mafia. Can be convincing when he wants to be. Will have to be against ..
Nicola Sturgeon, {SNP deputy, probably the most able deputy in any UK party. Has that Thatcher ability of sounding correct, even when she isn't. She'll be pleased with that comparison.}
Lord Paddy Ashdown, {Question time regular. Venerable elder statesman who now holds the same post as Kelvin MacKenzie .. instant desk filler for Sky/BBC news}

QT quiz regulars will spot the Scottish independence, HOL rebellion on disability,Ed Miliband's a lightweight questions in that.
And the real experts will have slyly noted the Camden Town reverse branch back to Paddington and the Sunday transit rule that allows a change at Tower Hill

Enter up to 5 guess questions into the comments below or tweet to who will also post on along with the myriad of other MPs, spads, spinners, political agents, pollsters, vested interest groups, drunks, politics students, media studies students who want to sleep with politics students, ax grinders, hippies, supremacists, communists, weirdos and the rest of the great British public. BBCQT - providing DIY entertainment.
Points awarded for accuracy, intelligence, wit,cynicism and exclusivity and on an arbitrary basis for no discernible reason at all.

Cityunslicker - 6
Miss S-J - 6
Hopper - 5
Malcolm Tucker - 5
Jan - 5
Botogol - 5
Timbo614 -5
Bill Quango MP - 5
Sebastian Weetabix - 5
Dick the Prick - 5
Amy 4
Measured - 4
Hovis - 4
Nick Drew 3
Budgie - 3
Miss CD - 3
Philipa - 3
Andrew - 3
Dearieme - 1
appointmetotheboard - 1

Winners are Miss S-J and Cityunslicker -6pts each who get to choose the route of HS3.


Malcolm Tucker said...

Scottish Independence referendum
Labour Leadership
NHS picking up the bill for removing breast implants
High speed rail link
Iranian assassinations {unlikely ..but the exclusive points rule..}

Botogol said...

OK, rolls up sleeves -- here we go. Best of luck to all.

Busy afternoon, and an evening out, so an early entry from me, and an attempt the predict the *key wordsand phrases* in every question- bonus points galore!

1 - Is David Cameron *meddling* in Scottish business?

2 - Shouldn't *everyone in the UK* get a chance to vote in the Scottish referendum?

3 - in the 21st C is a new railway simply a *white elephant*?

4 - Shouldn't *hard work* pay better than welfare?

5 - Should the NHS pay to extract the dud silicon from 40,000 pairs of *breasts*?

Nick Drew said...

1) Scottish Independence: bid for exact question bonus = "should we all get a vote on Scottish Inde ?"

2) Stephen Lawrence will feature somehow: I can't guess quite how but they won't be able to help themselves

3) HS2

4) NHS & breast implants (sorry MT but you are just plain right)

5) energy bills: exact question = "should gov't regulate energy prices ?"

GSD said...

Hi all. I'll bet Paddy will be really, really pleased with that comparison!

My guesses are:
1) Brum-London high speed rail link - expensive keynesian white elephant or much needed infrastructure upgrade?
2) Scottish independence - will their vote come before or after the UK's one on continued EU membership? (see what I did there?)
3) Torbin tax - can/will/should Cameron u-turn? And would it work to solve the crisis?
4) Welfare Reform - after defeat in the HoL, what changes should be made?
5) Iran - will the sanctions work as planned or spark yet another conflict in the region?

Amy said...

1. Should London be allowed a referendum on independence (without Scotland dictating terms)?

2. Should private clinics have to be insured and prove that they are keeping proper records before being licensed to perform cosmetic procedures so that the NHS never again has to pick up the tab for reversal and consequential injury?

3. Should Scotland or Alex Salmond personally pick up RBS's losses stemming from the acquisition of ABN Amro?

4. Have RBS management earned their bonuses by being brave enough to sack investment bankers and support staff with the aim of putting the bank on a surer footing, or should they only get bonuses for pursuing broader social aims, like full employment?

5. Can the government afford to give a second year of automatic benefits to those who happen to have paid small amounts of National Insurance contributions for a while?

Jan said...

1. Should people who have breast implants (or other types of cosmetic surgery) bear the cost of sorting out any problems themselves rather than the UK taxpayer?

2. Is Alex Salmond just a bit of a mischief maker or is he really serious about Scottish independence and is Cameron right to up the ante?

3. Has Tescos reached the peak of its success and was Terry Leahy canny in his ability to judge the right time to leave? (a bit like Tony Blair and the Labour party perhaps)

4. Will it be good for Britain if the the Chinese RMB is traded through the City of London or will it just be another way for bankers to earn mega bonuses?

5. Can we really justify spending on HS2 in these times of austerity and was this the best infra structure project? Why not the Severn Barrage instead?

Hopper said...

Greetings all, and thanks BQ for a new season of shouting at the TV.

I'm thinking a money theme:
1. Scottish independence - will England end up paying for it? (bonus to any panel member who points out the common theme in RBS and HBOS)
2. HS2 - job-creating stimulus, countryside wrecker, boon to businesses and commuters, rail line to nowhere?
3. Immigration: does the panel agree that it costs jobs, pace the recent studies?
4. Since we're in east London: Olympics, will we be ready?
5. Funding of airbags: who should pay for replacing privately-fitted boob implants?

Bill Quango MP said...

Hello all.
With so many questions to choose tonight I expect the only jokers to appear on the panel.

1. Stephen Lawrence. Should crimes be judged as the law stands now, or as it stood then?
{As it stood. Otherwise Eichmann might have got off with community service.}

2.High speed trains. Yesterday's future, today!
Wouldn't improvements to UK airports have been better?

3.Is 'Tory-led' Westminster interfering in Scotland's divorce?

4. Who pays for the boob, boobs?
{That question could actually be about anything.}

5. Is forcing someone to work for two weeks unpaid, in order to claim their benefits, a breach of Human Rights?

measured said...

Oh, I think this could be a tortuous one.

1. Scotland When is the time right to cast Scotland asunder, if that’s what the uncanny Scots want? Clever Cameron for trying to get Salmond to go up the garden path where he might get squished. What is wrong with the Union given we give them sterling? Are we also saying goodbye to Wales as they lose their MPs? …. they could go on for a very long time on this.

2. Well, oil will run out and the population will grow. What is all this bleating about HS2 about? It is a bit expensive though. Ok, let’s be Labour and have a party with the money.

3. Libya. So after a 4 year investigation, no one will face charges but another investigation will be launched. The names of who visited Libya are on the files but they can’t prosecute as it rests on the Blair/Brown policy on torture – was it equivocal or unequivocal? No, I am not taking bets. (I hope someone manages to get in when will we do something about Syria? The Arab League is a cover for letting Assad get away for longer).

4. Ed Miliband’s relaunch. What did he mean by ‘being fair’? BQ, I think we best ask David about that.

5. Is working for a few hours in Poundstretcher to maintain jobseeker’s allowance forced labour?

Miss CD said...

Goes for the obscure.

1. Tesco profits down. If even the mighty can't withstand recession is it time for tax breaks?

2. Scotland and separation. Can Cameron really just say it isn't in the terms of the lease for you to break the lease..So you'll jolly well have to stay.

3. Lawrence and Abbott. Are all white people intending to divide and rule?

4. Thatcher movie. Was it right to show the ex pm with Alzheimer?

5. Changes to the insurance laws. Is it right that people should be forced to prove they have been injured, just because they want to claim compensation?

hovis said...

1. Ed Milliband's leadership - a lost cause already?

2. High Speed Rail Link - is it the right (one/place/cost/time)?

3. Scottish Independence Referendum - is Cameron running scared?

4. Should we be contributing to the IMF (Euro backdoor bailout edition)

5 Iran - should we be sabre rattling with our US buddies?

I think I should actually replace the IMF question with a rip off of Hoppers Immigration question, however I'll stick with my originals. (Btw aside on the IMF - it was LaGarde's insistence on cutting consumption subsidies that has caused the General Strike in Nigeria, - don't be suprised if similar happen along the rest of West Africa.)

Se said...

OK, here goes...
1. what right does a man called Cameron have to tell the SNP what to do?
2. HS2, white elephant - why spend the money when it could be spent subsidising fares? (And that eejit Greening will pronounce it "haitch ess too")
3. Syria - time for a no-fly zone?
4. Milliband's a dead loss. When is wee Dougie going to plunge the knife?
5. Boobs & those nasty private healthcare people. They put 'em in - shouldn't they take 'em out gratis?

Sebastian Weetabix said...

Ooops! Twitchy trigger finger. "Se" is me

Budgie said...

1. Scottish independence now! Rid Scotland of the interference of Cameron, and his Meryl Streeperist Westminster government poodle entity. Salmond now!! Referendum now!!! (shouldn't that be referendum later? - Ed.)

2. Evil Tory-led Streeperist government forces Secret Services to help in the rendition of Libyans to Gaddafi in 2004. Inspector Plod to investigate - Saint Tony may be called to convict Streeperists implicated in torture at Guantalamo Bay. (Are you taking the piss? - Ed.)

3. Tesco collapse shock horror Christmas derivatives - evil Streeperism to blame. St Ed (either) to rescue what's left of the dis-UK. Plan A is too far, too fast, economy needs government stimulus and debt reduction too. Quick - Plan B to bail out Tesco.

4. HS2. Government prevents line extension to Scotland - typical evil Streeperism! Nationalise British Rail now!!!! If the Tory-led Coalition fails to do this an independent Scotland will.

5. Kind gentle female person forced into slave labour at poundland. Even wicked Streeperist HoL chucks out wicked Streeperist Welfare Reform (back to the 19th century) Bill. Minimum wage for those thrown on the dole by evil Streeperism, now!!!!!

Miss S-J said...

Its quite exciting, isn't it!

1. The act of disunion. All these problems about voting rights, who gets what and so on. We have done this all fairly recently with Eire. And any number of former USSR countries can offer up blueprints.

2. Urinating soldiers shock world. Piers Morgan claims 10 year late justification for fake photos.

3. High speed trains carve up and destroy beautiful countryside.
Of course they must have said that about those filthy, noisy, clattering, puffing, steam monstrosities that frightened both pheasant and peasant.
Now those stations are heritage sites and are a convenient place for a tea room.

4. Boob jobs. If private medicine put them in, then private medicine should get them out. Mass audience protest against any medicine not provided by the NHS.

5. Disability bill. Will the Tory-led welfare cutters have to think again? Can Lord Ashdown claim to have proved just how good the liberals are at holding themselves to account?

Hopper said...

hovis: ironically, my immigration was originally an IMF question, but I changed my mind. Let's see who'll be kicking themselves?

w/v: pedicure, good idea...

Timbo614 said...

Good luck all let's see if I can stay the course this time :(

1) Do the panel agree that the NHS should not foot the bill for bad boob jobs and that private clinics should make a clean breast of it and put it right even if they will go bust?

2) Do the panel think that the high speed train line is 19th Century thinking and how will the private company that gets to run the franchise ever pay the government(us) back the £32Bln?

3) I would like to ask the panel if they think we should just let the Scots get on with it and not interfere at a prime-ministerial level which is after all partly what they are complaining about in the first place?

4) What is the panels opinion on whether immigration (from Where ever) causes local job losses? It seems a "no brainer" to anyone who has recently lost their job (maybe in computer tech) to an far east immigrant...

Can't really see leaving out he Euro crisis so:

5) Who on the panel thinks the Euro is doomed if countries not in the EruoZone tell them no, no no to more bailout money (as is being hinted by the new shinier EU tough guy Dave?

Philipa said...

Ugh I don't think I can take any more Kelvin Mackenzie after the phone hacking enquiry performance; what an arrogant arsewipe! Anyway, here are my guesses:

1. Scottish refrendum
2/3. Welfare; specific ref to defeat in the Lords & poss housing? Cam is a bastard but EdMili is a twit - what a crap speech! Time for a new Labour leader.
4. HS2
5. PIP breast implants/NHS

Philipa said...

Actually I think if Thatcher was Labour leader The Iron Lady would have more chance of being PM than EdMili.

Philipa said...

Meryl Streep would have a better chance.

Dick the Prick said...

Hey peeps - happy new year, hope it's a good one.

1) HS2 and what's it all about?

2) Rail fares maybe...hmm

3) Jocktastic action (God, really, nearly 3 years of this shite now?)

4) Benefit changes and some wibble and finger pointing

5) Boooooooobs.

andrew said...

1. birmingham
why oh why oh why oh why spend 32bn which will end up as 64 just to get to brum. comms links used to be built based on need not a gap in the diary.
2. boobs
surely the private clinics have a legal duty to remove faulty goods
3. braveheart
cry freedom or cry foul? is dc interfering or standing up for the interests of the uk as a whole
4. borasic
most of us are - is this why tesco did so badly or is it the end of supermarkets?
5. bunce
is rbs getting rid of 3500 bankers not a reason to celebrate (ignore the fact that the ones losing their jobs are not the 1m+ bankers but mostly ordinary people)

CityUnslicker said...

Leaving it late:

- Is Red Ed being bullied by David Cameron?
- Should'nt we be building up heathrow rather than HS2
- Scotland - can we have Salmond as PM for whole Country?
- The Iron Lady - they just love a quick thatcher hate fest on the bbc

only four questions due to excess warbling about Scotland

appointmetotheboard said...


Guess who forgot to check the TV guide?

Bill Quango MP said...

The first Q: Nearly £33 billion is going to be spent on high speed rail... Is there really no better way you can spend our money?

Said Dimby, almost as if he means business. Bet he lets it all go flat by the 3rd question.

Everyone on the panel agreed with the train. Its necessary..doesn't cost much over 20 years and so on.

Man in audience derails! question by droning on about his stop. We don't care brummie!

Q: Who would be worse off if the marriage breaks up, England or Scotland?

Lets dump the Scots says Kelvin, rather uncharitably as there's 2 sitting next to him. Lots of chat about the 2013/4 date.
Most interesting thing was Dimbleby saying that only the 2010 election depended on Labour MPs. All other labour wins would have been achieved WITHOUT the scots.

Now the 1950 election had Labour just 5 seat majority above all others. I think Dimbleby might have been wrong with his bombshell. TWiki has the lab/con scots mp as a +8 for labour.

CU - Extra points for the Scotland waffling. Its been going on and is an exact rehash of the non argument earlier in the week. Dull..dull..dull on what should be a fascinating topic.

Q3: Can the tabloids survive the Leveson Inquiry?
So obvious really. With Kelvin on the panel..{Sigh}

Q: Should the NHS pay for the removal of potentially faulty breast implants purchased privately for cosmetic reasons?

One for everybody. Yahhhayy!

Bill Quango MP said...

Just 4 questions which is a bonus +1 for CU, and another +1 for being the ONLY 4 question guess.

{and welcome to everyone...keeping it quick - toddler sick means typing on balanced ipad }

Malcolm Tucker - Very good start. 5pts

Botogol - Good with the key words - 5pts

Nick Drew - The keyword was 2014.

GSD - No keywords either - 2pts

Amy - I reckon that's a 3pointer for the Implants - 4pts

Jan - 3 pts for the rail. - 5pts.

Hopper - hmm..well..ok Let the cleavage Q pass as a 3pt -5pts.

Bill Quango MP -5pts. oh yes.

Measured - 3pts for Scotland, then one more - 4pts.

Miss CD - bit too obscure -3pts

Hovis - give you the train as a full - 4pts

Sebastian Weetabix - Good -5pts

Budgie - Only 2 {but +1 for Meryl Streeperist Westminster government} -3pts

Miss S-J 5pts + 1 for act of disunion, -6pts

Dearime - it disn't come up. But under new labour eduction guidelines everyone gets a point just for commenting -1pts

Timbo614 - 5pts too

Philipa - not bad for a quickie -3pts

Dick the prick - will give the train one as it became all about fares. - 5pts

Andrew - 3 pts for them.

CU - having a good night -6pts

appointmetotheboard - just for showing up - set the reminder on the phone -1pts.

Winners are Miss S-J and Cityunslicker -6pts each who get to choose the route of HS3.

CityUnslicker said...

I don't recall ever winning! wow. 2012 off to a blinder