Thursday, 15 March 2012

Question Time: Ides of March edition

David Dimbleby is joined in St Andrews by Charles Kennedy, {Former leader of Libs. Realised that there were more votes to be gained from labour, than the Tories, but didn't do enough about it to make a strategy.} Ruth Davidson, Leader of Tory Scotland. Which isn't saying much. Mrs Quango has got at least as many Westminster MPs in her bed as Ruth has in her party. One. }
Frank Field,{labour politician who joined the wrong party. Maybe he could do a swap with Vince cable?} Humza Yousaf {brand new SNP minister} and Janet Street-Porter.{Really? Again? She's Ok, but every season? Can't BBC get a newer journo? Rebekah Brooks isn't doing much}

BQ thinks
1. Sixteen "Mudder'd" in Afghanistan. Time to quit
2. Should Eric Joyce resign as an MP?
3. Extradition from USA. Cameron can deliver? {no, he can't}
4. Rangers and debt.
5. Sea power needs £82 million 'investment'. Coal plant closes. Who's paying?
+ last quickie from Dimby
"When is a city not a city?"

Current Leaders

Measured -62
Dick the Prick - 57
Philipa - 54

Timbo614 -51
Nick Drew 51
Bill Quango MP - 50
Cityunslicker - 50

Malcolm Tucker - 45
Miss S-J - 44
Sebastian Weetabix - 43
Miss CD - 42
Botogol - 42
Budgie - 42
appointmetotheboard - 41

Hovis - 38
Hopper - 36
Jan - 35

Andrew - 31
GSD - 29
Amy 10
lilith - 9

Anonymous - 7
Mark Wadsworth -5
James Higham - 4
Blue Eyes - 2
John in Cheshire - 2
EK -1
Dearieme - 1


Hopper said...

1. Sadly inevitable: has the killing in Afghanistan sunk any chance of success there?
2. Greg Smith's attack of conscience: are the banks ripping off everyone and what can we do about it? [Don't mention the S in HBOS or RBS]
3. Government is trying to fix house prices in various demented ways. What should they actually be doing?
4. Why isn't the Scottish NHS funding more cancer drugs? Isn't that what it's for?
5. Rail fares: don't we pay enough already?
Bonus question: captchas: could they be any harder to read? Grrr.

appointmetotheboard said...

Heh. Hopper, try reading a CAPTCHA with screen reader software used by the visually impaired * dismounts 17 hand mare *

Miss CD said...

1. Extradition to UK/USA
2. Coach Safety
3. Hosepipe ban and Scotland's wet windfall if only they can figure a way of getting the water to the South.
4. Animal rights shuts down science.
5. police fitness. Should cops be allowed to be chubby?

Botogol said...

gosh will they really do afghanistan all over again this week? didn't they spend half last week's programme on it?

- is David Cameron's visit to the US worthwhile or is it humilating to watch him preening in Obama's shadow?

- is it tempting fate for the government to issue 100 year bonds?

- is the governments mortgage scheme going to cause another housing crisis?

- should we have the right to wear a cross at work?

- what can be done about youth unemployment in Scotland and other regions.

appointmetotheboard said...

1. Goldman Sucks. Is it time to return to long term greedy?

2. Credit rating agencies and (youth) unemployment.

3. Could an independent Scotland replace the USA and have a special relationship with the UK? Or, put another way, how can Dave go to the States and leave Old Nick in charge? Something about the PMs trip stateside, anyway...

4. With the trial of McKenzie and Muirhead, is it time to say goodbye to the Old Firm?

Perm one from five... finger in the wind...

5. Right to buy re-visisted.

CityUnslicker said...

1- Scotland, independent and heroic?

2 - Rangers - bust like the Socttish banks

3- Cameron in America - plannign war with Iran?

4 - the price of petrol, evil tories and their tax rises - budget next week so this is really a budget question.

Only 4 q's as very long winded asnwers from a panel of windbags tonight!

Malcolm Tucker said...

Evenin' all.

1. Cops told to take a paycut, get fit, and lose pensions. But they can have gas and a water cannon {not useable during hosepipe ban}

2. Afghanistan shootings. Is the call for the soldier to face Afghan justice totally bonkers. Human rights and all that.

3. Gay marriage. is this going to split the coalition where tuition fees and mansion taxes didn't?

4.Cameron and Obama. It may be a PR special to try and keep obama as president but at least Cameron LOOKS like he is the PM. Much better than that other bloke we had, with his trousers tucked into his socks.

5. Rangers. Should they actually be allowed to not pay their tax? If they come out of administration is all that tax written off? Even though it will be 90% the same people employed and on contracts, at the same place, doing the same job?

Sebastian Weetabix said...

1. Aren't minimum height requirements for the police more important than a fitness test?
2. Will the lights go out as we shut down coal power stations?
3. Is Cardinal O'Brien right to object to gay 'marriage'?
4. Eric Joyce/resignation demands
5. Asda asking suppliers not to put Union flag on packaging in Scotland "in case it offends" - why don't they just f*** off and take the SNP bigots with them while they're at it?

Budgie said...

1. Shock, horror - O'Barmy meets Camoron on Airforce One. Is Gordoom jealous? What colour dresses did SamCam and Michelle wear?

2. Shock, horror - police blame drunken fans for Hillsborough disaster. Who threw that toilet roll? Are the police fit for purpose?

3. Shock, horror - a few counties in the UK want to secede. Should the new boundary be drawn north of Odinburg to take account of the ancient kingdoms of Northumbria and Strathclyde?

4. Shock, horror - free vote on same sex marriage for real equality, Churches in turmoil.

5. Shock, horror - Rebekah arrested, friends of Camoron in the nick. Will Camoron rescue them on his horse? When will the BBC take over the evil, Thatcherist Murdoch empire?

Nick Drew said...

1. Special Relationship - is it still really there ? & what did the SR ever do for us ...

2. ... segue to: are we (/Cameron) just a US (/Obama) poodle, on Afghanistan & elsewhere ?

3. Police reforms - can anything as radical as is being proposed really be tried ?

4. Some rambling football question that allows Rangers & Hillsborough to be aired

5. Should Scotland be getting more revenue from selling energy and water to England ?

measured said...

Why, howdy, (B)BQ,

Or how do ye, och aye, stay up for the ping pong this week?

Off to the races*:

1. You have had our oil, our gas, our wind and now it’s our water. I hope someone points out that is uneconomic to pump it down here and they can keep their chips.

2. I am beginning to realise that religion is so arbitrary that views are dictated by what you think is best for society and then justified by the Old Testament/ New Testament/ Koran. I don’t know the answer and I don’t care about the outcome, but I loathe this constant Gay lobbying in the media. Just live happily ever after.

3. The American double standard. Condemning Iran, but supporting Israel, taking their man out of Afghanistan while telling us to send ours to them, calling it a Special Relationship.

4. The economy …. jobs, 100 year bonds, oil reserves …. looks dire. Poor Gideon. At least Goldman Sachs might be able to find a way of baling him out for a bit longer for a price.

5. The Police... A force to be proud of? Plod plot to trot.

* Have you seen how many horses have had to be put down at Cheltenham this week? They can’t call that animal research.

andrew said...

1 the special relationship - clearly the us dont think it is so who or what do we turn to. the eu

2 gay marriage. demonstrating the increasing irrelevance of organised religion

3 should that us army person be delivered to the afghanis - or the icc...

4 mice and drug testing. how many mice is a human worth

5 100 year or irredeemable bonds - diverting attention from the economy and fitch putting us on watch or sign of strength

gsd said...

Hi all. After last week's pathetic attempt, things can only get better*!

1) Is the Scottish Gov right to press ahead with minimum alcohol pricing?

2) Should RBS be sold early at a loss?

3) Something about Rangers & the SFL spat.

4) Is Gov policy to blame for the increasing numbers of ppl in Energy poverty or is it just the recession/cuts etc?

5) What is Cameron doing in the States? Come to the what does he actually do when he is back here?

[* technically not true - they could just stay the same... which given my previous form is more likely]

James Higham said...

Mrs Quango has got at least as many Westminster MPs in her bed as Ruth has in her party.

Or under her bed?

Timbo614 said...

Going against the grain tonight...

1) Privatising 999 or (9 -what?-what?) which is reported to be able to save 5 Million(million not billion) over about 10 years - P**sing in the wind? and for what gain? Profit from misery for someone with a burned down house? (Sorry luv we woz on and working together walking holiday errm training at the time).

2) Seguing into my last weeks miss about privatising the entire **king Police Force, sorry, "Service". More profit from pain?

3) More Mortgage Mess, Have "they" not learnt? "They" are desperate for us (ye People) to get into more debt! So they can create more money ('coz the total - vis- housing stock is dwindling and that can't be allowed to happen - not even a little bit!). They are so desperate another part of "they" is offering to put 1000s straight into my bank account for 3% for the year! and that's on a credit card!

4) Fuel poverty for 8.5%, petrol prices, cigarette prices ;) and the budget : Any chance of easing the pain chancellor?

5) Were the children and adults (on the Swiss coach) wearing their seat belts?

Wish me good luck with the catchpa...(attempt 2)...

Mark Wadsworth said...

I suppose i better start limbering up for next season

1. Should our troops stop off on the way home from Afgh and sort out Syria?

2. Obama/Cameron, do we still have a special relationship (that question for Chris Tappin who unfortunately can't join the panel tonight)

3. Gay marriage. Should a gay man be allowed to marry a lesbian?

4. Mansion Tax. Phew! Good job we're sticking to savage taxes on earned income, eh?

5. That FirstTimeNewBuildHomeBuy kick start the housing market nonsense.

PS, yes, apparently the kids on the coach were all wearing seat belts.

Philipa said...

1. Rape. Mumsnet is a powerful force, lets see if they raised the issue high enough to get on QT? The story of the woman being prosecuted for retracting an accusation of rape against her abusive husband + the man who accused a uni of sexism on a gender studies course? Far more interesting than Gay marriage blah.

2. The 'Special Relationship'. Are we still in bed with the US or is it time to bring our troops home from Afghanistan and tell them astalavista baby?

3. Railways/fares/public transport? Ooh hang on it's in St Andrews so er.. devolution/separation all that.

4. Tax. We pay for Scotland if you don't count BP? And the EU should get a mention in there somewhere.

5. RBS and whatsisname, the LIb Dem economist bloke saying any business can be a bank and RBS should be a state bank? I thought it was..

Soz if I'm a bit woolly, I'm tired but wouldn't miss this comp :-)

Dick the Prick said...

Evening fellow psycho's. Bit rum that behaviour, anywho

1) Afganistan - maybe some kind of self determination nonsense.

2) Unemployment

3) Where's me list....Benefit changes - Working tax credit. Got a lot of time for WTC but it does subsidize the minimum wage. HMRC are shit loads better than the DWP, anywho.

4) Extradition - fuck him. 1 of the NatWest 3 fellas has written a boook (Jock) and as guilty as hell and, well, the FSA is shite.

5) Freeeeedom!! etc etc (probably number 2)

Really chuffed the Yanky defence sec pulled the plug, that is worth more than any finance shite; if they wanna blow themselves up then run fastly away. Endgame. Israel has to pop Iran because there's an army in situe. Whey hey hey....cunts.

hovis said...

I am the former state govenor of Abuja Central Bank .... ummm ok wrong email, my entries for the evening:

1. Afghanistan - derailed - time to get out?
2. Something scottish - I'l steal a question about Tax and Rangers - maybe worked in with the budget
3. RBS sold early as Hester says?
4. finally an NHS catch all question

Bill Quango MP said...

First question - What should George Osborne announce in the budget that will significantly decrease long term unemployment?

Wasn't expecting that. Makes for a boring first answer. Tax and Spend vs whatever the hell the Coalition plan is. "There are others that consider there are some jobs that are beneath them," says @FrankFieldteam

Q2: "Would Scotland be better off out of the union. 'spose someone had to ask a divorce question.
"There is debate about where we put voting age in [Scotland] but you don’t shift goalposts for one referendum.

Q3: In a recent poll nearly 3/4 of people said the conflict in Afghanistan is unwinnable. Is the exit strategy an admission of defeat?

Q4: Was Donald Trump justified in warning the first minister not to be "mad Alex" over wind power?
Apparently Scotland is going to be 100% wind powered. Good luck with that. Please don't ask for a subsidy.
Humza mentioned marine technology so I'm claiming a point.

Q5: In light of proposed minimum price for alcohol, why do the responsible majority have to suffer because of irresponsible minority?

Bill Quango MP said...

BQ - 3
Hopper -4 {1 for a bank mention}
Miss CD - way off -1
Botogol - yoof unemployment saves you -3
appointmetotheboard - Tough tonight -3
CU -3
Malcolm Tucker - 2
Sebastian Weetabix - well not really, but some came up in conversation -3
Budgie - 3 + 1 for the toilet roll -4
Nick Drew - 4
measured - some right -4
andrew hmmm - a generous 3
GSD - 6 + bonus for the alcky pricing - 8
JH: There is that old joke . Why do we have these cushions on the bed? There's loads of them. We just chuck them on the floor.
Mrs Q - it makes the bed look nice during the day.
{thinks} Who's looking at the bed in the daytime when I'm at work?-1
Timbo614 3 + 1 for the 999 thing that would have been a good question.
Mark Wadsworth: Just can't resist matching wits with the BBC - 3
Philipa - sort of - 4
Dick the prick fellow psychos?- this could be your season -7
Hovis - 4
Winner is GSD with 8.

What a dull show that was. Even the twitter couldn't really be bothered with it. Dimby was the best one.

Dick the Prick said...

Jockland, booze - sitting duck really! Cheers Bill or in Joycey's words, fak yoo ya Sassenach Cooont.

Jan said...

Oh no, missed it as I completely forgot

Miss S-J said...

Me Too!

Bill Quango MP said...

Mis S-J + Jan .
remind me to award 1 point each next time.

Still 5 shows to go.