Thursday, 4 October 2012

Question Time compo

Panelists in Manchester, fresh from conference, include Douglas Alexander MP,{Blairite/Brownite kingmaker} Susan Kramer or Baroness Kramer. orange book liberal, and Willie Walsh, hate figure of the left for being a predistributer cap-predator-poncer or something. + expected Ken Clarke {former every ministry under the sun, current roving minister without an office. And Janet Street Porter for the billionth time.

Enter your guess for what you believe the entirely balanced and impartial regional audience will ask of the panel. maximum of 5 guesses allowed. Various special rules apply that are hidden in the terms and conditions even more cunningly than on your mortgage application.

BQ predicts.

1. One Nation under a groove Miliband {its a gift for Lakelander }
2. Planes, trains and contracts under seal
3. Turkey and the coming mid east war.
4. Police funerals and Manchester's gang problem
5. Inflation? dunno really...

Over to you.


CityUnslicker said...

right early entry after missing last week...

1. is 'Red Ed' dead and PM Ed born?

2. child abduction, change laws, do something etc

3. Airport capacity - gives Willie a chance to say let's build on Heathrow.

4. train wreck - government are incompetent, everyone should resign.

5. Police are amazing, heroes and in the public sector.

They won;t mention the new BBC expenses scanal me thinks. hopefully Ken will.

lilith said...

1 Is groupie culture a fair enough reason to turn a blind eye to paedophilia and does the BBC still apply this practice with its weirdo "stars"?

2. Does Ed really mean "one party" when he says "one nation?"

3. Has Branson been vindicated?

4. Is it safe to be a police person in Manchester?

5. Is Ed officially "normal" now he has given a speech that gave John Pienaar an orgasm?

Hopper said...

1. Are our streets more dangerous for police? Too dangerous for women officers?
2. Labour conference: did they lay out an alternative to the Toriedems?
3. Why build a new London airport when you can just extend Manchester's?
4. More parents challenging school places, why not just make schools better?
5. Who did the panel think won the presidential debate, and does it matter to us?

Nick Drew said...

I think Lil may be wrong abt her #1...

should be Turkey/Syria/Israel, as BQ says (seeing as that's where The End Of The World kicks off) - but QT has remarkable blind-spots


1) who cares if Miliband went to a comprehensive ?
2) who cares who 'won' the POTUS TV debate ?
3) traincrash (and remember, these are the same civil-servant/dumb-minister combos that will give us a new nuclear deal with EDF ...)
4) what is this 'Facebook' of which you speak ?
5) gotta be something on poor April Jones after the saturation news-coverage she has received

[If 5) happens, hopefully the audience can shout 'wot about Jimmy' before the minders can get in amongst them]

Malcolm Tucker said...

1. Police gun carrying. Should they all be armed

2. Train wreck on franchises. Who's double checking the 4G licences?

3. Boris airport. He won't stop yakking about it.

4. Should we elect our politicians on their ability to shoehorn a phrase into every minute of an hour long speech?

Thats the lot.

measured said...

1. Goodness Gracious, Goodness Gracious, Howze about that. Howze about that. Boys and Girls, Did I really? Did I really? I spoke to the B.B.C. Could we fix it so it is back to the Palace. Jingle Jangle.

2. Well, NATO is conveniently based in Turkey.

3. One Nation. Yes, Ed., teacher said work on originality.

4. Less Branson pickle. Train crash (metaphorically). Blame the government. No, no blame the civil servants. No, blame the policy. No, blame the methodology. Hapless ministers.

5. The Police? Duggan v. unarmed WPCs

Dick the Prick said...

Now then, now then, uuurrrgghhhuurrgghh etc.

1) Is it wrong to cast peado claims against the dead and / or wtf not before?

2) Cuts cuts cuts - hmm... plump for the vague conduit being the NHS.

3) Train clusterfuck

4) Syria so wee Doogie can scare the crap out of us should Labour get elected.

5) Labour party conference - bit esoteric but maybe whatsit allaboot?

Mark Wadsworth said...

1. Miliband, One Nation, our next PM? Is he a millionaire.

2. Jummy Saville kiddy fiddler, well for a change at least he just did girls, boys would have been pervy, BBC cover up - what did David Dimbleby know about all this? No, don't fob off that question onto the panel, I'm asking YOU!

3. That maths teacher who went to France, missing girl April in Wales (it was probably raining)

4. Taking away means testing universal benefits for Lord Sugar and Peter Stringfellow and them pensioners in Ireland for whom we are paying £6,000 a year each for health care, like in that Panorama programme yesterday. I blame the emigrants.

5. Turkey shelling Syria, shall we go down there and join in the fun like in Libya?

Or to sum up: "If Jimmy Saville had absconded to Syria with an underage girl, would we take away his universal benefits and NHS payments or would we elect Ed Miliband and start shelling him?

Budgie said...

1. Turkey vs Syria, score 1-0 at tenth time? Is it deja vu all over again?

2. Missing child April. Why didn't we hang the Moors murderers and all subsequent abductors/torturers? Oops, that's not politically correct is it?

3. Do you need a socially useful bank?

4. Will the Chinese support Boy Moribund when he needs to borrow to support his fantasy Balls?

5. Hillsborough and shot PCs. Do we get the police we deserve? In which case, which are they?

See, I'm really jaundiced (that means pissed off to you lot), I haven't mentioned Fatcha once. Until now.

Bill Quango MP said...

And the first question: Is the government right to scapegoat civil servants for the West Coast rail "fiasco"?

Q2: In the light of the recent deaths of two police officers, should British police now be armed like their American counterparts?

No one agrees.

Q3: Has Ed Miliband found his voice?
What can we say about that drivel. it was competent. But to quote someone..
"It is much easier to be critical than to be correct."
Benjamin Disraeli

Q4 Is it right to investigate Jimmy Savile’s past now he is dead?
Don't believe they have asked this so soon. Good for those who called it.
"There was definitely a culture of inappropriate sexual behaviour [in TV presenting]," says Janet Street-Porter
She's let a large cat out of the bag. Lion sized . Good for her.

Q5: Are we risking an "economic catastrophe" by delaying airport expansion in the south east of England?

Libby Kramer says 'no to runways because of climate change!"

BTW we did all spot the Willie/runway question didn't we?

Bill Quango MP said...


CU 8 {bbc salaries story is under embargo until midnight}

Lilith 10 out of ten!

Hopper - 5 Runways!

Nick Drew but QT has remarkable blind-spots..yes. - 3

Malcolm Tucker - 7- vg.

Measured - 8 + 1 for the originality joke. - 9

Dick the Prick - 5 Now then, now then, uuurrrgghhhuurrgghh etc at first glance i thought you were making some scatological reference.

Mw 4 + 1 for the brilliant sum up -5

Budgie 3 { fatchur only got a handful of mentions. Even in Manchester they are beginning to forget}

Winner was Lilith with an amazing 10.

You get to decide if and where the next runway goes. Might I suggest the neighbouring constituency to mine. So my constituents can have all the employment and advantages but none of the noise?
Andrew Neil just pinched my 'One nation Under a groove' joke for his opener on This Week!

lilith said...

Well, this is ironic. The only time I ever had shares in anything it was in a proposed estuary airport. Lost every penny...

I nominate Whitehall as an ideal runway.

Elby the Beserk said...

One question from yours truly.

How do you watch this garbage without kicking in the TV screen?