Sunday, 18 October 2009

Gordon Brown's Crackers

The PM was asked a tough question a few days ago. One that he wasn't briefed for and one that he felt too unprepared to answer. This question that had Gordon Brown flummoxed was

What is your favourite biscuit?

Asked at a Mumsnet session where the leader was trying to set out his vision for a pan global solution to the credit crunch and demonstrate his communication skills and man of the people credentials, The PM resorted to evasion.

Imagine the tough questioning from Mums twittering the Labour party leader.

"What's your favourite biscuit" Sarah-Jane , Telford.
"I believe in choice. That is why we introduced competitive tendering into the NHS.."
"Prime minister..what is your favourite biscuit?" Lindsay, Stockport.
"Erm .. I can't read that..sorry ..Next question?"
"Gordon..what is your favourite biscuit?Do you like pink wafers" Kylie, Guildford..
"Well, I think the real issue here is about Labour investment versus tory cuts.."
"What's your favourite biscuit. Will you answer the question?"
"If I may just be allowed to answer the question without these interruptions..Now I bailed out the banking sector.."
"Gordon..do you believe that men eat more biscuits than women?" Harriet, Westminster
"I don't have those figures to hand but if you write to me at my office I will have the ONS look into that for you.."
"Sarah is on record as liking plain biscuits-You were inclined towards chocolate. Did you threaten to over rule her?" Mrs Paxman, Oxfordshire.
"I have made my position quite clear.."
Did you threaten to over rule her?" Mrs Paxman, Oxfordshire.
"I canot answer this questions on the grounds of national security.."
Did you threaten to over rule her?" Mrs Paxman, Oxfordshire.
And so on.

Today, after two days working non-stop with various focus groups and spin doctors, cautios not to alienate any section of the community, but anxious to demonstrate strength and leadership, whilst also appearing sensible,frugal, but not miserly the somewhat lame answer to this question of national importance emerged.

"Anything with a bit of chocolate."

Really? He looks absolubtely Cream Crackered to me.
Or maybe, in view of his indecision a Cowardy Custard Cream?

Sunday snooze.. In the comments if the mood takes , biscuits for
George Osborne
Tony Blair
Boris Johnson
Vince cable
Baroness Scotland

10 comments:

Mark Wadsworth said...

GB didn't want to be tricked into admitting that his favourite biscuit was one that he wanked over and made somebody else eat.

Saturn V said...

George Osborne -RITZ crackers
Tony Blair - anything with JAM
Vince cable - Fox's Assortment - pick the ones you like , something for everyone

Baroness Scotland - She just takes the biscuit.

James Higham said...

[chuckle]

Anonymous said...

Peter Mandelson likes Garibaldis.
Nothing like enforced unification to stave off hunger.

Nick Drew said...

Blair - Jammy Dodger

(None of them = Nice)

There has to be a bourbon joke here ...

lilith said...

Does Mark Oaten favour Digestives?

lilith said...

John Bercow has to love shortcake..

Sackerson said...

Chocolate coated Rich Teas are hard to beat - better dunkers than choc digestives. Honourable mention for Club biscuits (plain, or orange); chunky Kit Kats v. nice... tough call.

Blue Eyes said...

David Cameron - Hobnobs (sounds posh but really quite substantial)

Nick Clegg - Rich Tea (not much substance, falls apart under pressure)

Alan Johnson - Digestive (working class favourite)

Alex Salmond - oat cakes (slow burn calories, no sweetness at all)

George Osborne - cream crackers (fiscally very dry)

Bill Quango MP said...

Alistair Darling - Short{of}bread

George Osborne - Millionaire's shortcakes from Fox's super indulgent range.

Gordon Brown - McVitie's Boasters.

Tony Blair - mini shredders

Boris Johnson - more of a crumpet man really.

Vince cable - Tesco value caramel wafers. Looks like the real deal but is actually quite disappointing.