Wednesday 30 January 2013

Performance related pay for MP's

The deserving poor
This week, as is becoming more frequent in a Country which is on its uppers, there are some big raging disputes about pay and with it the usual class warfare that has become endemic. Yesterday I opined upon the Bankers and their approach to their own pay and rations. Shame is foreign word for them and money tops morality at every turn, especially when there is so much less of it about (OK, we have Quantitative Easing, but that is yet to leak out in a positive form, just inflation), the bonus's on offer are very precious.

Today the focus will turn to MP's pay. David Cameron is keen to restrict this to 1% or less. An MP earns a paltry £63,500 a year. In London, a few secretarial staff at law firms earn this, albeit in other parts of the country this is a very good wage.

The Speaker Mr Bercow, the dwarfian menace, was quick to rise yesterday to accuse Mr Cameron on not caring about MP's pay because he was too wealthy himself to notice. Of course, the same could apply to him but the House of Commons is indeed made of glass and full of stone-throwing hypocrites, but I digress.

What better way of moving forward than assuming the better aspects of banker pay and using this to help with the Gordion knot of MP's pay. MP's should be paid a no salary and a performance bonus.

so for 2012 for example:

George Osborne - A truly rubbish performance, missing targets, unable to co-ordinate with his team and a big fail on financial targets bonus withheld.
Nick Clegg - Approach to work caused many unnecessary divisions with the Government and also leads to confused strategy which heavily impacted on delivery on key performance targets. Bonus withheld
Ed Milliband - Some improvement in performance over the previous year. Still given to talking more than doing, a useless quality. Half rations
Michael Gove - Hyper-active and effective in transforming a difficult education department. 150% bonus payout
Gordon Brown - Failure to attend work at all. No pay, Human Remains to be informed and to be placed on weekly reporting...

I missed off the obvious one - what do you think?


13 comments:

Blue Eyes said...

Ed Balls - should get his salary on a government-issued debit card so as to help him cut down on cake.

On the subject of Gove, apparently everyone HATES him at Education. Good effort. I hope his next move will not involve the Peter Principle, though.

James Higham said...

They'd starve to death if it was performance related.

Nick Drew said...

Big Dave -

to be put on a new incentive scheme: either he delivers a binding referendum on you-know-what, or it's out with the Big Pair Of Shears (veterinary grade)

I may not be taking this seriously enough

Blue Eyes said...

I was trying to think of a big hitter that you had missed off the list. Cameron didn't even occur.

Jan said...

Why are we so hung up on percentages?

1% of nothing is 0. 10% of nothing is 0. 100% of nothing is 0. Whereas 1% of a good salary such as that of MPs is actually quite a lot.

ModernLibertarian said...

Link pay to some multiple of the median private sector salary for the last FY.

Budgie said...

If you take Gove and Pickles out of the equation, there isn't anything the Coalition has got right. So cast iron Dave has a lot to answer for. Rather than pay he should be fined. Him and Clegg can pay the increase given to DfID.

Electro-Kevin said...

I agree that the pay is particularly not good for London bearing in mind the commitment a dedicated MP must give.

A rise cannot be on the cards bearing in mind that the public sector pay is being capped at 1% and frontline soldiers are being fired in order to 'save the economy'.

I've a different idea to the bonus scheme proposed:

Much of Parliament's work is being outsourced to the EU.

When work is outsourced isn't the normal way of it to close UK based offices, call centres, factories, mines ... ?

So why should the indebted British public have to finance two governments if so much of the legislating is being done in the EU ?

Let's have our in/out debate and referendum. Let the EU loving MPs know that most of them will be cast out of politics if the vote is 'in'.

Electro-Kevin said...

Jan - You could argue of percentages that 40% tax is a hell of a lot more money than standard rate on an average salary.

idle said...

Cameron: For a rich kid, his expenses over the years have been embarrassing. Peformance - mostly show. He's the sort that wins best turned out but disappoints in the race, which now I think about it is the perfect analogy; he looked great in the paddock at the 2005 conference, won the rosette, but has turned out to be entered in a race some way above his abilities. He needs to go down a grade or two, back into handicapper company.

Agence communication said...

this is completely true "" Cameron: For a rich kid, his expenses over the years have been embarrassing. Peformance - mostly show. He's the sort that wins best turned out but disappoints in the race, which now I think about it is the perfect analogy; he looked great in the paddock at the 2005 conference, won the rosette, but has turned out to be entered in a race some way above his abilities. He needs to go down a grade or two, back into handicapper company. ""

Agence communication said...

this is completely true "" Cameron: For a rich kid, his expenses over the years have been embarrassing. Peformance - mostly show. He's the sort that wins best turned out but disappoints in the race, which now I think about it is the perfect analogy; he looked great in the paddock at the 2005 conference, won the rosette, but has turned out to be entered in a race some way above his abilities. He needs to go down a grade or two, back into handicapper company. ""

Agence communication said...

this is completely true "" Cameron: For a rich kid, his expenses over the years have been embarrassing. Peformance - mostly show. He's the sort that wins best turned out but disappoints in the race, which now I think about it is the perfect analogy; he looked great in the paddock at the 2005 conference, won the rosette, but has turned out to be entered in a race some way above his abilities. He needs to go down a grade or two, back into handicapper company. ""