Thursday, 15 January 2015

BBC Question Time : Unfunny Comedian's self publicity edition.



David Dimbleby presents topical debate from Lincoln. On the panel: Conservative defence minister Anna Soubry MP, Labour's shadow foreign secretary Douglas Alexander MP, president of the Liberal Democrats Baroness Brinton, journalist and broadcaster Mehdi Hasan and historian David Starkey.

Pretty sound lineup. Mehdi-Starkey should be a rematch of the third crusade.Only with a bit more bloodshed.

BQ suspects:
1..Je Suis Charlie. Mais pas sur SKY NEWS
2..Theresa May: She think the terrorists may have used a new technology called  Email. So she wants the power to read every email ever sent ever.
3..Israeli Ambassador .. Jews fleeing Paris. jews in London feeling threatened. Those Jewish 'police cars' That are you an anti-Semite poll.Turkish PM saying Hebdo was a Mossad attack to make Muslims look bad..Now let's all blur Palestine-Israel with fanatical Islam to really confuse the issue.
4. Al Murray- Publicity stunt for a fading comedian or a publicity stunt for a faded comedian..You decide.
5.Weaponise the NHS./ Was Miliband wise to use such a provocative word? This week of all weeks. The numpty.



  Scoring
1 or 2 points for each correct question asked. Depending on how close to the actual wording.
5 points for guessing the colour/design of  the Dimbleby tie.

 2 points for nearest match if no outright winner
1 point for each witty comment/excessive punning/ lampoon/mock/clever theme  that you put into the comments
1 point for the first entrant each week 
1 point for random other reasons

League Table 2015 

Hopper -1

Charity Shield winner - Malcolm Tucker.

 

16 comments:

Bill Quango MP said...

Forgot the Dimbletie - GREENS

CityUnslicker said...

blue dimbletie

1. Nous ne sommes pas Charlies - not in British press anyway.

2. NHS - EVIL TORIES ARE COMING FOR YOUR BABIES

3. Defence - LOONATIC Tories buying plans without proper identification equipment

4. Brits amazing at oscars, as long as they are playing gay or disabled people - LEFTY HEAVEN

5. TV Debates - scared Cameron, redux.

4.

Nick Drew said...

(0) plain grey
(1) let's raise the tone: is deflation worse than inflation?
(2) oil industry - wicked carbo-capitalists or much-needed employer?
(3) Andy Burnham attacking fatties - oooh, whetever next? Altogether now: blame the victim!
(4) the Mayor of Rotterdam said what?!
(5) is Black Friday such a good idea? (© CityUnslicker 2015)

Malcolm Tucker said...

tie - mint green with windmills

1, je Suis charlie and the cowardice of much of the uk print media.
Even the BBC managed to show the cartoon.+ the Pope says freedom of speech doesn't mean attacking faith.

2. Greens on the debate, again. Is Cameron frit?

3. Teachers and grooming and the usual paedo story.

4.God botherers become communists. Archbishops prefer Marx to Jesus.

5.Greens now have as many members as UKIP.

There's a lesson for the big boys. If you say you love cuddly bears and hate evil big business and price your membership at just 10p a week you can sign up thousands and thousands of gullible students.
Makes the membership look good even if the chance of them actually voting for you is pretty low.

Hopper said...

Dimbletie: light blue with windmills

1. Are we at war with Islam, is this all a terrible misunderstanding, or is it time to make like Sky and wave the white flags?
2. If the government is going to read all our messages, why can't we read all of theirs?
3. Is it time to change the format of election debates and be all inclusive? (Why not throw the leaders to the mob and see which one lasts the longest?)
4. Should hippo-level-fattiness be a legit disability, or should the sole home conversion funded by the state be the removal of the food storage?
5. Deflation is coming, isn't this great?

Steven_L said...

1) Terrorism
2) Terrorism and snooping on communications
3) TV leaders debates
4) Pensioner bonds / election bribes
5) Fuel duty / energy price stabilizers anyone?

Tie: The dark one with the blue frogs.

Budgie said...

Tie: maroon with white stripes (not "the" white stripes you understand).

1. Does freedom of speech have limits? Discuss until 2094. Is the Pope a catholic? Is Fawage a wacist? Was Fatcher evil? Are climate change deniers financed by big oil? Will "Je suis Charlie" be the new no.1 hit? Etc?

2. Can Andy Burnam save our NHS by banning evil Fatcherist parents from force feeding their innocent kids with fatty foods sold by Fatcher's favourite corporate fat-cats??

3. Why won't Cameron debate on TV with that nice Mr O'Barmey? Is it because he refused to go to Paris? Sorry, should that be the nice Mr Green?

4. Petrol at £1 per litre again. Will it just encourage the plebs to get in their evil cars and burn up the motorway? They should be banned. Should the government increase fuel tax to stop the resulting global warming?

5. POTUS - will we have another Bush president?

Anonymous said...

Educayshun....Kids to be shown Lesbian porn at grade 6 and When can, can't she - a school girl be allowed to groom her teechur?

NHS and labour will look after it - and how.

Will he won't he [Dave] - election debates.

What are the greens - Bolsheviks or and the SWP?

Have the Wahhabists already taken over Britain.....because, evidently - not one national newspaper/broadcaster [sky+bbc] publicly exhibited any of Charlie Hebdo images?

Is Dave a Muslim convert?

Kilgore Trout said...

The tie will be mostly purple-ish

1) Why should the government NOT be given more surveillance powers? If you've got nothing to hide...

2) Should the Greens be invited to take part in that venerable constitutional tradition from what when before the Romans arrived - The Leader's Debates?

3) What's the deal with the oil price? The government planners promised prices would keep rising forever unless we gave them control of the energy market... hang on...

4)The Pope says "Je ne suis pas Charlie" (no idea if that is right). They brought it on themselves when they decided to offend the attackers faith, apparently...

5) Silly, jokey question... If you were a chocolate bar, what brand would you be?

DtP said...

Do you think at some stage they're gonna get panelists to go into the diary room and talk shit again?

Hello from the bottom of the barrel, how's it going up there? FFS

Uuuurgghh

0) Ocre, a mud tie
1) Terrorism natch
2) Free speech and stuff. My mum made the perfectly reasonable point that why do we see all these suicide monologues from jihadists? That's pretty fucking offensive.
3) Some community stuff - nature of protection - what price freedom and Teresa May's whatever?
4) Are GPs cunts?
5) Crikey, bit of weather!
4)

Bill Quango MP said...

Ok - evening all.
Looks like a mint green and sky blue tie with gryphons?

Mehdi and Dave kicking off on Q1 - Freedom of speech.
The crusades refought. told you!

Q2 - Should the government read all our emails? Got very very boring very quickly.

Q3 - grooming teachers and sentencing.
usual waffle. Starkey has lost the audience now.

Q4 - should we tax more or streamline services. Sounds desperately like a made up BBC question. Can't imagine the audience was asking this one.

It was a crappy show with loads of assorted activists in the audience. Poor

Anonymous said...

Al Murray is a public schoolboy (Bedford) from an aristocratic family. Our ruling class may have many differences, but are united in favour of mass immigration.

I wonder who's funding him ?

Bill Quango MP said...

Anon - New post about Al Murray coming up.

Scores.

BQ - 4
CU - 2 +1 for 1st = 3
ND - 2 {it was an odd show . Odd and pointless}
Malcolm Tucker - 3 + 2 for the tie - 5
Hopper 4 = 2 for the tie = 6
Steven_L welcome back - 2 {That pensioner bond won't last the month. Get some if you can.Tell your nan!}
Budgie - started so well .. 3
Anon - good run - 4
Kilgore Trout good too -4
DtP - just made it - 3

Winner is Hopper.
Whose prize is he gets to decide whether the greens are allowed to debate or not.
Your decision is final.

Hopper said...

Thanks BQ: Greens get to debate, but only with themselves.

Anonymous said...

Re Anonymous - Al Murray.


Who ponied up the £36,000 for the full page Metro ad today?

Mark Sindone said...

I'm really confused what is going on here. I've been stuck in the self storage pods for too long. Excuse me while I google on my mobile unless someone would be so kind to explain…?