Friday, 15 November 2019

Friday Fun: One wish from the Labour Magic Lamp

So, as we have long know, social media and Brexit have destroyed our body politics. Our political class has now stopped any pretence of seriousness and just promises anything to try and bribe voters; in many ways this is the end of democracy.

Back in 2009 and 2010, we wrote a series of articles on Greece - two years ahead of the eventual terrible financial crisis. One of the main takeaways was that the politicians in the Country had reduced democracy to bribing their own voting factions and nothing else, plus the bribes were increased massively with borrowed money. The result was a bankrupt country with 25% unemployment and a ruined body politic. I recall warning we may head the same way and by a little more circuitous route we have indeed!

Anyway, it is Friday so it is a challenge day. Imagine you are a political leader in the UK and you have one last bullet to fire to get as manay votes as possibly through electoral bribery - what do you choose to make free with you magic money tree wand?

23 comments:

Anonymous said...

Electricity.

Don Cox

John in Cheshire said...

Guns and ammunition.

CityUnslicker said...

Amsterdamn

Thud said...

For me...LFC season ticket.

andrew said...


Free bananas for all

Morecambe and wise - the magnificent two

Anonymous said...

Just give a thousand pounds to everyone to spend on what they want. Far cheaper than any of the present proposals.
M.

Nonny said...

similar to Anon131: Helicopter money - up to GBP10,000 = approx (equiv QE of 445bn/52m adult pop)

Suff said...

Tax free living for everybody for as long as we are in power and the people get to decide when the next election is.

Sobers said...

Free food. Nationalise Tesco and just give the goods away........what could possibly go wrong????

Bill Quango said...

Free Food is not a sustainable pledge ,comrade Sobers.
However, a free tractor for all, will be a one off gift, that will ensure free food, forever.

Timbo614 said...

We promise 10 additional bank holidays every year we are in power to celebrate occasions, and therefore the dates, to be agreed by the people in a frenzy of referendums :)

It's winner!

Anonymous said...

free healthcare for life, free education for your kids, wage that you can live on and security in your home. boring.

err screw that; football on your fondle slab, powered by wifi that the evil facetwit pay for. everyone gets a prize and no more austerity.
simples.

Raedwald said...

Here's one that will cost very little - free honours for anyone that wants one

At age 50, no criminal record, full tax history - Knighthood or Damehood of choice - KBE, KCB, KCMG, KT

At age 60, qualifications ditto, a life peerage.

Our honours system has become so corrupted by political honours, we may as well give them out to everyone as a reward for good behaviour.

Jan said...

A free house............most unlikely and we'd all squabble for the best ones but I can dream........

Anonymous said...

Cancelling all student loans would guarantee a few million votes.

E-K said...

KFC

It's the only place that doesn't get burned down in a riot.

E-K said...

...Pizza Express is a little too upmarket these days.

Raedwald said...

Pizza Express? Too full of the unsweaty masses for my taste ..

Matt said...

A free (in terms of both cost and lacking in penalties) safari with large bore rifles at the Palace of Westminster.

CityUnslicker said...

Anon - cancelling the student debt will indeed come true in the next week or so from the magic lamp.

Sobers said...

Wouldn't it be quite easy to cancel all the student debt without resorting to any Magic Lamp rubbing, merely by calling it what it really is, a graduate tax, instead of pretending every graduate has this 'debt' they need to pay off? Every graduate gets to pay X% extra on their income tax, all the money going to fund the university system. You could even hypothecate the revenue and let universities 'charge' a different graduate tax if you liked. Oxbridge might get away with demanding a higher tax rate because they'd still get plenty of applicants, the University of Oil Drum Lane might have charge a bit less to draw in the students........

Calling the funding for universities 'debt' which has to be repaid by graduates is rather like telling every 18 yo they have a massive 'debt' to the State which they have to repay over their working life. Or Income tax as we call it.

yanceyker said...

The article was just amazing.I really appreciate the author for making such effort. Thanks for sharing.

patently said...

I quite fancy having a police force that investigates stuff like buglary & fraud instead of focusing their attention on trendy causes.

Wait, no, that's ridiculous.