Thursday 26 August 2021

Wind Your Neck In, Tony Blair

Blast from the past ...

We're hearing too much from that man.  Originally penned with Iraq in mind, but the song remains the same.  The usual apologies to Edward Lear. 

They went to war in a Sieve, they did, 
In a Sieve they went to war: 
In spite of all Hans Blix could say, 
At Bush’s command on that fateful day 
In a Sieve they went to war! 
But when no weapons were found in the place 
And everyone cried, “You have no case” 
Said Tony Blair “we’re trusting to luck” 
We don’t care a button! we don’t give a f***! 
In a Sieve we’ll go to war!’
Far and few, far and few, 
Are the scruples of Tony Blair; 
His lies are bold and he’s shameless too, 
And they went to war in a Sieve. 
They went to war in a Sieve, they did 
And totally unprepared 
With not enough armour for soldiers to don 
With too few choppers – the list it goes on 
But Blair, he never cared. 
And every one said, who saw them go, 
“O won’t they be soon undone, you know! 
For the list of shortcomings is terribly long, 
And happen what may, it’s extremely wrong 
To send our boys unprepared!”
Far and few, far and few, Are the scruples of Tony Blair… 
The casualty figures soon started to rise, 
The coffins they soon came in; 
So to cover their arses they lied and lied 
(No sign of remorse for the many who died) 
And they gave the order to spin! 
And they hunkered down at Number 10 
And they lied and they spun and they lied again 
"Though the charges against us be ever so long 
Yet we’ll never admit we were rash or wrong. 
While we have breath, we spin!”
Far and few, far and few, Are the scruples of Tony Blair …


lilith said...


Elby the Beserk said...

The People's Laureate/ Magnificent, Nick!

Anonymous said...

Be honest, Blair was merely the hired-hand (talent-spotted and managed like a boy-band singer) as a consumate political frontman. "Tony, you sell our policies and we'll guarantee your wealth when you leave Number 10."

Anonymous said...

In other words,
"...At Bush’s command on that fateful day..." !

Jan said...

Will he(and Bush)ever be prosecuted for war crimes? I think I know the answer to that one.

jim said...

Excellent versifying.

A cynic might think that a few weeks ago there was a quiet meeting in No10. 'We're getting out, don't want too many refugees - OK Priti, it'll be a cluster-f^&k, leave it to the mil, we'll play dumb, make it quick'. This on the advice of the secret squirrels who knew.

'You go on hols as usual Dom, don't arouse suspicions - nothing you can do anyway'. 'We can blame old Biden etc etc - usual story'. 'Stink will die down in a week or two'.

Alternatively, the secret squirrels didn't know and the above plan was cobbled together pdq. We might get to find out one day.

Thud said...

Worth a moment of your time.

Matt said...

Not sure about Bliar winding his neck in - I'd prefer we stretched it (preferably after a ~ 6 foot drop).

E-K said...

I'm surprised Tony Blair is still alive.

I know a LOT of ex servicemen and the number of those who say "If I had a terminal illness the one person I would slot..."

(Liked Matt's comment.)

APL said...

"We're hearing too much from that man."

Then, a moment of unanimity on C@W.

andrew said...

He is a person with no honour.
He clings to his failures an calls them evidence of moral right.
If he died he would get a state funeral but i would like to think liz would be unable to attend.